Life After Stroke by The Sea "Kelli"

Kelli tells her story about the event that changed  her life.

ScrambledEggs&Ham is more than a podcast — it’s a movement for stroke survivors, caregivers, and anyone rebuilding their life after loss or change.Each episode shares real stories of recovery, strength, and hope.

Stroke survivor stories, brain injury recovery, post-stroke confidence, neurorehab inspiration, Scrambled Eggs & Ham Podcast, DreamEffortTenacity, Bill Clarke

https://www.buymeacoffee.com/bill1

https://www.sgi-usa.org/basics-of-buddhism/

contact Bill@dreamefforttenacity.com

Transcript

https://otter.ai/u/46Q3Iw0ds9J8yf_vByP0LnptRMsbill  1:00  
All right, good morning. Thank you. This is Bill Clark, from scrambled eggs and hams and Don Wade is my co host. And today we have a special guest. Her name is Kelly Smith. Is that correct? Kelly?

Bill Clark  1:13  
Yes, sir. Okay, so I am scrambled eggs, Kelly, and you are.

Kelly  1:20  
I have been involved. I have been a stroke survivor for about 13 years, if not a little bit more, and I'm just round about awesome. Oh, you sound awesome. Well, you sound awesome. So you are a stroke survivor. So, so my. And Don, you are Ms. Survivor, right. And yes, I have MS. Okay. Wow. So you know, thank you so much for coming on the air with me for the scrambled eggs and ham. So I'm the scrambled eggs. So who's the ham today?

Oh, that would be me. Absolutely.

Bill Clark  1:57  
Hands down every hand foot up in the room? Yes. Okay, wonderful. Wow. So Kelly got to ask you a few questions. Not many. Don has a few with you. And we talked earlier about your passion. But we're going to get to that in a couple of minutes. So when do you have your stroke?

Kelly  2:17  
I had my stroke. February 24 2009. Wow. Wow, that's the same here as to same your head mine. I had mine in the summer.

Oh, wow, it seems to be really popular time that, you know, that year. She Yeah, I it was my first day off because I worked at the time and in a in a bank. And I also worked part time because my oldest son at that, at that time wanted to race dirt bikes. So that's a really expensive hobby. So, it was my first day off at that

time and I went to have

I wanted to do some self some self care and, and during that

there was a medical mishap that caused a a dissection in my left of vertebral artery that caused a loss of blood flow going to the left part of my of my brain at that time and I pinched my neck ever to decide not I did not know at that at that time that that that was actually stopping

the loss of blood. I just knew that it made me feel a little bit better. And then when when

the I think it was the EMTs came first when they put me in the C collar

that is to keep your keep your neck your neck stable all of those all those clots that formed naturally in my in my brain went into the into the post a circulatory system which is which is also your your going to your brainstem going to your cerebellum so I have a little bit of

have gone absolutely sideways. But I mean, if you look at me, you would never know. But those who do

know me and that and and that really have known me for a long time. They can they truly can tell that I am not the same and I'm fine with that. Okay. Okay, so I'm already.

Bill Clark  5:26  
So do you know what type of stroke was that something called a bleed?

Kelly  5:33  
Kind of. But it was a bleed that was caused by

the

I don't know how to best explain it, it was a bleed cause when I went to go get my neck

my neck

adjusted, I guess you could say because I went to a to a chiropractor, and he had twisted my neck just in that certain way that just caught and that truly does happen a lot. But we just never really hear about it. Because it's really hard to be well. So you're saying that. So actually, if I understand you correctly,

Bill Clark  6:25  
those things, some of those positions that chiropractors put people in can cause damage?

Kelly  6:32  
Oh, absolutely, absolutely. Um, I actually met a gentleman while I was in the hospital, who was doing, he was doing

situps at home. And he had pulled on his neck and he calls a he caused a a stroke, because he had tore his artery. Wow. Wow. So I mean, it is. So I mean, I am so scared about anything with the width with the neck because it is so tender, and is so precious. Because you have so many just have so many things back there. Yes, they can go. So yes, something that I've heard is something like that with someone that was fixing their car. They were bending over fixing the radiator. And you know, the position that their neck was in in your head was in causing a major a major stroke? I've heard something like that for someone shared his experience with me. But Don, do you have a question for Kelly?

Well,

Don  7:44  
as I was listening to story, and it's very interesting, because

Kelly  7:50  
basically

Don  7:53  
really shows how connected eating is in the body. And yeah, and

Kelly  8:03  
if you damage anything along the way, you could conceivably position issue. But that correct? Yes.

Don  8:16  
So,

Bill Clark  8:17  
So Kelly, you were talking about earlier, you were telling me about your passion about young people that were sent home earlier? Right. Absolutely. And had a major stroke. Can you tell me talk a little bit about that, as well. Um, I have, I have been so fortunate to meet so many so many

Kelly  8:42  
younger folks that have had a stroke and because most of the training that you that you can get and what the doctors get normally say that it is somebody who either

is over the age of we'll say like maybe like 55

does not take good care of

themselves

or else it is or it is something something in their family woods, that is all true. But it can also happen to people who are you are under the age of 25 A can it can it can even happen to people who are under the age of 10 Yeah, and and

my cousin actually had a stroke when she was like not even a month old.

So I mean, so I can have this so I have I had I have friends with a girl in kind of state who she went to the hospital down there. I mean, just complaining about I mean everything that could be

Which is like, which is a, which

was everything she was saying was to, to us now would be clearly stroke. I mean, clearly it was just like, everything blew up. And she got sent home she had a horrible double

cerebellum stroke, which is like, which is like, unheard of. But I mean, she too, if you look at her, you would you would absolutely never know. But that does not mean that she is just not a fallen just mess. And she is just one of just many people that I have that I have. I had either met, or I have had the pleasure of talking to that

have gone to their gone to their doctor or gone to their hospital and just showing classic signs and being and being told, Well, you're kind of young to have something like that done. So why don't you just go home and brush and they did that, and then they ended up having a stroke. Sometimes some are, are just worse off than most you know what it is? I want. I talked to a couple of doctors that were visiting in my local rehab, when I was going through my rehabilitation, and I and I brought that up to them. And they pretty much sense. But you know, strokes. Strokes normally happen to people who are who are

I think they said like 65 of the time which is true, but you should not just say okay, only those people have it. So we are not going to look at someone who is coming in who is a 16. Right, who a who is who is showing the classic signs of it and just say okay, you can just go home breath.

Come back if you feel, you know, worse, and they could either have a major stroke, or they could even die from it. And that is just horrible. Yeah, yeah, I think it's so unfair. And men and women show signs a

little bit differently, kind of like with a, when they go into a

I think it's a cardiac arrest, they may show signs that are a little bit different at times. And that also goes with a stroke, too. So you know, I mean, I just wish that they could.

Bill Clark  13:16  
They could be more. I mean, I trust me, I know they are busy. I know they have to care for so many people, I get that. I totally understand. I wouldn't ever want their what their job, but I just want them to also know that, hey, it really could happen to someone like me, it could happen to someone like my to, to my cousin, you know, I mean, it's just, it's just that Yeah, I think I had I had some problems when I had a stroke, the inadequacies of health care where I had, I think I had a doctor, and I'm not going to mention his name, who's because I am African American, who basically said, you know, African Americans have strokes and heart attacks, and just blew it off like that.

You know, and I was so upset about about that he just mentally minimalized it, you know, and I was I was struggling just to get mitt, you know, my memory was like shot. And I was walking, I was walking off balance all the time.

I was gaining I couldn't, I couldn't walk in a straight line. You know, I couldn't even remember my son's name.

And I named me and I named him. And then you have someone who just minimalize my experience, which is very upsetting to me. You know, how it was categorized, and you know, blacks have strokes and mannerisms and that's true, everybody has, you know, but anyway, so you know, that's interesting that I think what you said is that they need more knowledge or more training.

Kelly  14:52  
Is that what you're saying? Yes. Yes. And I wanted to say something about the memory.

I,

I have known what? No, I have no, I have what is known as a virtue. Read amnesia, which I do know certain things. I don't know why I know certain things because I, I tell people that it is the,

my

sorry, I tell people that

I work like the the things that I know that I don't know why I know them. That is the old me who died in 2009. Still in me somewhere, because I have almost no memory of,

Yasko  0:20  
We in this one I'm sure it's not for that struggling

Kelly  15:47  
of about 2009 up till maybe like my most crisp one is like, pie about 25 minutes ago.

Bill Clark  15:57  
Okay. I have a question for you. So So you're saying? What's what effect was affected the most by your event? Was your short term memory or your long term memory?

Kelly  16:09  
Yes. Yes. Both. Okay, so you were talking about your son, right? I have I have two boys, I have no memory of being pregnant with them. I could not I could not tell you what they were like, as little kids. I have no clue. And it's like I, my parents have given me a photo album. And I can look at it. I can tell who it is. I can't tell where it was. Why was what we were even doing. I know that my parents are my they are my parents. I cannot picture them. When I was young, I could not tell you two things that we did. I mean, I do know that as I do know, as we as we age. The our, our long term seems to just get just get worse. Well, I can tell you, mine is already there on my. So it's so it's like I so. So I basically live like every day is a brand new day, because it really truly is. But I mean, it's not to the point that I I mean, I learned by doing the same things over and over and over and over. So if you told me something I did not. I did not make a make a note of it somewhere. Or if it was not, if it was not something that just grabbed me that I was like, really that I wanted to learn more about in about 30 minutes. It'll be like, Wait, what did you tell me daddy? You know, so? Yeah, so I mean, for Kelly, Honey,

Bill Clark  18:19  
how is your Don, do you have a question for Kelly?

Don  18:22  
Actually, I do. I am sorry, Kelly. I was just listening. And I was absolutely I was it was amazing. The whole retrograde amnesia, because it was it's such an amazing thing to me. It had me thinking about the movie Groundhog Day. I said, Oh my goodness. She asked us start over and over and over because of this retro bit amnesia is amazing.

Kelly  19:07  
Well, thank you. Um, it is because it's hard because tell you things I don't know if it's things because I had been told these things. So I don't know if it is the it actually what happened because either I my parents tried to tell me things as and I normally go. Was I there? Yeah. And they're like, yes, you were there. I'm like alright, did I have a good? Did I have a good time was it like you always say because I have no idea. And I have a twin sister and She fills me in a lot, because I have no idea about FAFSA on like, what is it? What is that? What is this? And I mean, I mean I do. And gosh, it's I mean, it's it is really hard sometimes because I feel like I will like i Yes, my youngest son just turned 19 on Thursday.

Bill Clark  20:31  
Yeah, I see. Just I seen the pictures of your of the birth. Amazing pitchers.

Kelly  20:37  
Yeah. Oh, yes. I think you and I, and I look at him, and I get so sad because I will. He's grown. So I feel like I missed out on everything. My oldest son is 28. He is in Florida. And it's like, and the thing which is really hard for me is when things are for, sorry for me. Out of sight, out of mind, and it's really difficult for me, because I have to keep on. Like, you know, I have to just almost like bug him like just to like, talk but you know, like, just so I can just so I can keep him in his the forefront of my brain. It's, it's such a challenge sometimes.

Bill Clark  21:37  
Okay, I got a question for you. So how is help Kelly? How is your handwriting?

Kelly  21:44  
Oh, well, so it varies. I am I had been well, I am because that's what I did. Okay. All right. And, and I am weaker on my right side. Okay. I mean, not, I mean, not. I mean, I can I mean, I can move my legs and my arms. But I can't quite hold a pen for a long period of long period of time. So I normally sign things just like a huge on the iPhone at large because I just can't write like really tiny.

Bill Clark  22:31  
Okay, so what kind of when I was at Kessler, I did my rehab at Kessler. And I recommend that place for anyone. It's absolutely had an incredible experience there some incredible experiences. And I went to a lot of brain games, you know, a lot of brain game training to get my handwriting by back and I wanted to things that I was able to really help me with executive functioning was I learned how to play chess. What was some of the things that you did to recover to get some of your movement back to get some of your memory back to sort of like, be able to navigate through life? With this?

Kelly  23:16  
What I did, I don't know. I really don't know. I know that I went through a lot of rehab went through cognitive cognitive behavioral therapy was I know I did some things there. When I'm at home, I like to do a I love to do puzzles. I'm not good at it, but I like to least try. Okay, um, I do listen to a lot of stuff I do. I mean, I I do journal. But it's strange, because when I go back on it, I have no memory of that day. Even me. Even. I mean nothing, obviously. Wow, it's just like, it is so weird. Sometimes. I don't know what I do. I just, I do it. I gotcha. I don't like it's like, I don't really know. I just know I have to. So I do it and I have amazing friends. I had just amazing. My family is absolutely amazing. So I say I use them a lot. They really and they truly helped me out a lot.

Bill Clark  24:45  
So you know, another thing that I want to talk to you about was you get a chance to go to work right? You're working?

Kelly  24:51  
Yes, sir. Yes, sir. Wow.

Bill Clark  24:54  
I think that's wonderful. And how is that? How long have you been working

Kelly  24:58  
since Oh, yeah, no, it was just super I think three years September Thank you very Thank you very much I do abruptly about 88 hours and a month and that's pretty much all I can do so that's pretty much working like 11 times during the month because I mean time to run my system because even even by going out to the store it's just exhausting it I am completely just exhausted so so I I worked at a bank for a long time that I could pretty much do all the different kinds of things in the bank as and I would travel to to travel to help the help the other help the other branches is out Yeah, so you

Bill Clark  26:06  
are floater. You are floater. What do you call a floater? Hi, that's

Kelly  26:09  
kind of how Yeah, I mean, Titus but yes, but no, but yeah. But now I now now I work at V, sorry, I work at is the Ark of Cape May. County in New Jersey with which they which is they basically help out those with, with physical and physical and to get the word physical and

Bill Clark  26:43  
cognitive or mental you're looking for.

Kelly  26:45  
I think it's meant to be fun. It's not the mental difficulties. I think it is something like something I like my

Bill Clark  27:00  
Oh, I totally. I totally, totally understand. Don, do you have a question?

Don  27:06  
I totally get as well. Are you utilizing technology in any way to remember a lot of the things you've done already? So yeah.

Kelly  27:27  
So like, you were going to say so like what,

Don  27:32  
like using a calendar system to remember what is coming up in the day or document system to remember to write down what you've done. So these things that you might go away in terms of the memory, is there some place that you have memorialize what you've already done?

Kelly  28:08  
Yeah, I use the calendar on my phone, I have calendars everywhere. I have to write down everything because I will just completely forget about it. Things that I am done they I do break some of it down. I do try to keep up some things that I had done I mean, my my short term is getting a little bit better. But it's not it is not is not great at all by leaps and bounds but I mean it's getting a little bit better and I don't do that many things because I get completely overwhelmed by by if there are too many if there is a large crowd out if there's too much noise I get completely overwhelmed and I do become exhausted. So the things the things that I said I do now since I do not do them often are very, they are special for me because I don't really do a lot of things now. And I used to do everything because nothing bothered me but now things bother me and I just tried to like stay at home and I'm and I'm just happy as can be.

Bill Clark  29:57  
So you live by the ocean. Is that correct? I do well. That's a beautiful place to do to, to get in touch with yourself, you know, living by the ocean.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai